There is much confusion
regarding the roles of a husband and a wife plus the roles of a Father and a
mother in the family. The husband's responsibility is to focus on his
relationship with his wife on how he nurtures their relationship as husband and
wife likewise with the wife. To complete each other that the man is not
complete without the woman, there is a danger when the husband and wife are
apart. Man will seek something else to fill that emptiness if it happens too
often it could be work, woman, wine; whatever happens to come along at that
time.
The woman was made for
the man too, and this was to be his crowning glory, 1 Corinthians 11:7. Matthew
Henry says, “Man was dust refined, but the woman was dust double refined” the
wife should not compete with or criticize her husband. She is to make her
husband proud of her and to make that the number one thing in her life. Her
submission and spirituality may win a lost husband. The husband’s love and
leadership may win a lost wife and children. Also, the role of the father and
mother should be differentiated that a father and mother to take care of the
needs of their children and be a good provider for their kids including their
financial needs and education and social development as persons to be a good
example in the community.
According to Dr. Joseph
Tan about the unity of understanding of the Husband and wife’s
responsibilities:
1.
He is to love the wife – love must have willingness by the individual involved to
show it. Love does not generalize but discerns, love does not confuse but
communicates and clarifies. The husband put the highest interest of his wife
and not his own and he provides that place of security and love for the wife, a
friend, and a lover all rolled out in one.
2.
He is to look after the
wife - that means to
provide her material needs because women in general want a secure life, they
are worried about their daily needs for the children’s foods, education, and
clothing that are well provided. Then physically that the wife will look
beautiful for the husband to maintain his beauty by giving her needs and not be
a worrier that destroys the beauty of a woman when in stress.
3.
He is to lead the wife - the question is “who takes the lead spiritually in the
home? The husband is the one who calls for prayer, reads the scripture, and
teaches the truths about God for the children to grow in the knowledge of the
Lord and his grace, as He is the priest in the family to fulfill the spiritual
responsibility.
The wife’s role to
fulfill her responsibilities to her husband:
1.
She is to be submissive
and in subjection to the husband - Wives must keep in mind that the role they are to play in life
was not decided by their choice but it is from the word of God in 1 Peter 3:1,
Ephesians 5:22,24. Submission in no way suggests that God thinks any less of
the wife. It is different in function not of value. He is not superior or
inferior. He made us different in roles to fulfill; he made man a leader and a
woman a follower. God brings them together into a union to support, to
help, to strengthen, to complement, to supplement one another, and not to
fight.
2.
She is to possess
spirituality - 1 Peter 3:1-6,
show how the Christian wife must be genuine in her spiritual life. To be the
kind of woman God wants her to be, she manifests a true concern for her
husband’s salvation and spiritual welfare by being modest and have an inward
beauty.
3.
She is to stay attractive - it may sound immature or superficial according to Dr.
Tan but the man looks at the outer beauty of a woman that a man’s need for
physical attractiveness in a woman is profound. So ladies stay beautiful for
your husbands, attitudes may change but it is hard to become beautiful
outside. A wife's attractiveness is a vital ingredient to the success
of her marriage and any wife who ignores this notion, whatever the reasons,
risks disaster according to Dr. Tan.
Contributor/Article by: Armando D. Fermin
Edited by: NjA
NjA Art & Photography
